How Not To Be A Supermodel

It’s the second you’ve all been ready for*: my first ever ebook, How Not To Be A Supermodel, is accessible for pre-order! Here!

An precise ebook that it is possible for you to to carry in your palms. Or, if you happen to favor my dulcet tones, take heed to along with your ears. You’ve cherished my revealing life updates, through the years, and also you’ve diligently learn via my farcical tales of woe (bear in mind after I virtually unintentionally penetrated myself with a shower faucet?): now it’s time to let me take you all the best way again to 2001, after I was a mere slip of a factor, leaving my regulation diploma to turn out to be an immediately wealthy and well-known supermodel.

You may name How Not To Be A Supermodel a memoir, as a result of I wrote it about myself and my recollections and the experiences I had as a style mannequin within the noughties, however my God that makes it sound very severe. “Memoir” makes it sound as if I wrote my ebook within the 1800s. Within the drawing room, while mom did her needlepoint and Eliza practised on the pianoforte.

And let me ask you this: would a memoir, to your thoughts, embrace a narrative about unintentionally happening a luxurious five-day vacation with a person you didn’t know? Would a memoir usually have a chapter known as Physique Like a Turgid Penis? Or – maintain on a second whereas I rustle via my notes – I’m Drunk and I’m Not Carrying Knickers? No it might not.

So sure, I wrote it about me and sure, it’s set prior to now, however don’t make the error of pondering that any painful soul-searching went into this ebook. Let’s not get the improper finish of the stick, right here. I didn’t write it while sobbing periodically right into a starched linen kerchief, dabbing my eyes when it bought to the insufferable bits: it is a rip-roaring riot of a journey via a decade of the unbelievable situations and stunning occasions that life as a non-supermodel threw up, and it’s chaotic and blundering and humorous and incessantly ridiculous.

Pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel

OK, there are poignant moments. After all there are. In reality I used to be particularly advised, after I bought the ebook deal, that I needed to embrace the bits that might create one thing of a speaking level. (As if me inadvertently changing into concerned in an impromptu intercourse present or virtually falling into shark-infested waters wasn’t sufficient of a speaking level.) And so sure, I’ve put within the troublesome bits in addition to the entire elements that may probably have you ever spitting out your espresso and embarrassing your self on public transport.

However principally it is a snort-inducing, extremely correct** account of all of the methods during which I didn’t turn out to be a supermodel. My obvious bodily shortcomings, my character defects and my spectacular skill to draw chaos and catastrophe in virtually any scenario.

You possibly can pre-order How Not To Be A Supermodel now – the discharge date is twenty ninth August. It has already been heralded as THE ONLY BOOK YOU NEED TO READ THIS YEAR!*** and so I feel it’s a fairly protected wager that you just’ll like it. Pre-orders actually matter, apparently, and so if you happen to solely ever click on on one hyperlink I publish then please make it this one. I’ll be endlessly in your debt.

Pre-order your copy of How Not To Be A Supermodel here

I’ll be again with extra posts in regards to the ebook and in regards to the means of writing it as a result of it has truthfully been one of the best, most satisfying factor I’ve ever accomplished in my grownup life. For those who’ve adopted me for some time you then’ll know that writing was what I had began to do on the finish of my modelling profession; running a blog was a really completely happy accident that took off into one thing nice and I’ve an excellent and rewarding profession in social media due to it, however I’ve been hounding a ebook deal for a really very long time****. It’s a correct “full circle” second for me.